So many times, especially with my first, I found myself thinking “Why didn’t anyone tell me?!”. I wish someone had let me in on all the strange and fantastic things that can go on during the crazy transition into parenting and even after. When I was pregnant I noticed I received countless knowing smiles from every mom I saw. Now I know why and give that same knowing smile to moms-to-be and moms too. It’s essentially involuntarily joining a secret club. Just like parenting, you really have no clue until you’re in it. There are some things that are not mentioned (at least not to me!) about the whole birthing, baby & becoming a parent thing. Maybe some are things you just won’t understand until you’re a parent. Maybe some people just forgot. Maybe some didn’t want to make you more nervous than you already were. We shouldn’t mask the good, the bad, or the ugly about child birth & raising. Smile that knowing smile or cringe along with me. This is what I wish I had known.
- Delivering the placenta is just as painful!
- They push in on your stomach after giving birth and hours later multiple time. I would take contractions, or even a stab in the eye, over this torture any day.
- You might get the shakes and/or your limbs can go numb before, during and after.
- Stitches hurt. Whether you had an episiotomy or just tore. Think razor blades & fire when you piddle.
- You probably heard about babies first poop but no one told you how much yours would hurt. Take the softeners.
- The pain doesn’t stop once baby is out. No, they don’t let you off that easy. You still get contractions for a while. Worse yet if you breastfeed.
- You will miss feeling baby in your belly.
- The leftover skin feels very strange. Like bread dough. I kneaded it a little, even pulled a Homer Simpson and flopped it about.
- Cone head looks weiiiird.
- There is no way to prep your nipples for breastfeeding. It can hurt but it WILL get better.
- Sex could be painful afterwards.
- I didn’t know that if you sneeze you just might pee your pants until after the fact. There is a reason for Kegels!
- Babies are born with crazy primal reflexes. If a baby feels like they are falling they will reach their hands out to grab. And I’m sorry but your newborn can’t really walk.
- The mom guilt is astounding. It’ll getcha.
- You will wake up to a crying, doo-doo covered crib & baby at least once.
- You will discover just how little sleep you can actually survive on.
- Make sure you have baby Tylenol, gripe water & gas drops handy, always. The day you don’t is the day you will need it.
- Most of the fears are groundless.
What are some of the things about birth, baby and becoming a parent that you didn’t expect or wish someone had told you?